Eggplant.place

16d

What do you mean OR? 🤔
I can broil in existential dread and plot a fantasy series at the same time. 😂 Luckily I don't make mistakes, at least not any I'm willing to admit too 😜

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Post by C.G. Drews

Apparently some people go to bed and just...sleep???
They don't plot a 7-book epic fantasy series or softly broil in existential dread or replay every mistake they ever made???
And then they wake up [checks notes] REFRESHED? | just. It sounds a bit fake.

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38d

Maps are great, but this is greaterest 😊

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Picture of a book where the map folds out so at to stay on the side of the text while you read.
Captioned: Every book should have its maps set up like this...

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89d

What does Balrog taste like? Inquiring minds need to know... 😁
Also, are the Elves an allegory for the diffrent ages of Brittish royalty? 🤔

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Elves in Tolkien's legendarium
From THE HOBBIT:
-Wine from warm lands
-Fire-roasted meat
-Likes dancing in the meadows and making flower wreaths
-Spends time singing and feasting
THE LORD OF THE RINGS:
-Minwvor, Lembas (mysterious and magical elven food)
-Ages-old wisdom in the eyes
-Totally mysterious
THE SILMARILLION:
-Blood of the slain kin
-Flesh of a Balrog killed with bare hands
-Starts each day with new war
-Covered in scars from fighting and being tortured by Orcs
-Killed at least 10 family members

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109d

Ham-fisted construction is my favourite 😂

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abridged fairy tales by John Atkinson, Wrong Hands
Goldilocks: Home invader has ceral, breaks stuff, then falls asleep.
Hansel and Gretel: Some kids eat an old lady's house. Also cannibalism.
Beauty and the beast: Stockholm syndrome girl falls for ugly guy. Except he isn't.
Princess and the pea: Mattresses piled on a vegetable determine fitness to govern.
Cinderella: Wardrobe malfunction prompts strange footwear mating ritual.
Three little pigs: Ham-fisted construction keeps wolf at the door.

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high