The much-needed manifesto by the Sanest Politician in the Entire Cosmos, from capping the price of croissants at £1 to taking over Downing Street.

'Count Binface will be Prime Minister. It's only a matter of time' Independent

Greetings, life-form! My name is Count Binface. I am an intergalactic space warrior, leader of the Recyclons and three-time British election veteran. And as part of my overarching mission to control the entire omniverse, I have come to conquer Britain.

It's not that I want to do this — you need me to. Because the one thing everyone can agree on right now is that Earth is in an absolute state. And of all its messed-up nations, the British are particularly deranged.

In this book, I share my story for the first time, my political beliefs and even the occasional recipe, in return for a reasonable — nay, bargain — amount of Earth currency.

I also provide an alien's-visor-view of your past, so that you can learn from past mistakes. This isn't the first potted history of Britain ever to be committed to print, but I can guarantee that compared to any others, mine will be the most accurate. If anyone cares to argue about that, which one of us has had access to a time machine?

So settle down, grab a beverage, and let's make your planet Count.

'Count Binface in his steely, glimmering, elusiveness is both a galactically intimidating — and curiously heartening symbol of the future of British politics — #believeinthebin'
Rory Stewart

'Count Binface is out of this world'
Emily Maitlis

Armando Iannucci hosts the programme that gives you a cast-iron guarantee to be laser-focused on decoding the baffling world of political language.

Each week he'll be joined by a guest to crack open the political phrasebook and attempt to demystify the doublespeak. Why does everything now have to be 'turbo-charged'? What's the difference between a 'pledge' and a 'mission'? Why has my local MP been 'weaponised' and should I be worried?

You'll be treated to a crash course in the dark arts of political language from people on the inside who are both baffled and beguiled by it. They'll walk you through the various verbal fiascos of the modern political lexicon so that by the end you'll be oven-ready for an appearance on Newsnight.

Armando's erstwhile partner in de-baffling political lexicon, Helen Lewis, is away working in the United States in the autumn and so her seat will be kept warm by a rotating cast of co-hosts.

Listen to Strong Message Here on Thursdays on Radio 4 at 9.45am, and an extended version is available on BBC Sounds.

Produced by Gwyn Rhys Davies. A BBC Studios Production for BBC Radio 4.