neurodivergent

Many of us had to figure out our own queer/ neurodivergent identities, and or how to manage our disability(s).

I figured its time we had a book bundle in which characters do that, by authors on the same journey(s).

So I organised this fantasy & multi-genre bundle.

https://itch.io/b/3781/figuring-it-out-queer-neurodivergent-disabled

#QueerBooks #Neurodivergent #books #DisabilityPrideMonth #Disabled #DisabilityBooks #fantasy #Bookstodon #FantasyBooks #LGBTQIA

ALT

This is a bit polarising, but I do think that autistic people are black and white thinkers while at the same time we are able to find the nuances in between. I have the impression that many neurotypical people think in shades of grey, but stay away from the black and the white to be able function.

This is goes into the same direction as the intense world theory and us having a spicy skill set.

Some years ago I read a tweet that stated, that autistic people's memories are sharp pictures while allistic people have kind of blurred movies. I don't know if that's true, but makes sense in this context.

It takes us so long to get the whole picture, but once we have it, it's very precise. We build it out of details until we understand the concept, it doesn't come to us naturally, it's hard work.

I made the experience that people perceive me as negative when I am rational and do not make positive assumptions. I can face my and other people's shadows, I am not afraid of them, they don't make me sad or even depressed. At the same time I can experience ecstatic joy, also known as autistic joy, that comes across as childlike or weird to neurotypicals.

So yeah, I live in the black and the white and all the colours this world has to offer. It's not rigidity, it's intensity and rationality.

#ActuallyAutistic #AuDHD #neurodivergent
@autistics

Unlearning the wrong way, does not automatically teach us the right way and I guess that I am not the only autistic person who had to learn that about neurodivergent relationships.

In other words, embracing your autistic self, unmasking the autism and acting like an excited toddler on coke are not the same thing.

I mentioned it in other posts before, that we didn’t have an autistic kindergarten, that we did not learn healthy autistic behavior and socializing while growing up. It’s not our fault, we don’t have to feel ashamed for it. What our parents, what the world taught us was often unhelpful, even damaging for most of us.

That creates problems in our neurodivergent relationships, we can overwhelm, destabilize each other or feel like we are still too much, even with other autistic people and that hurts.

Going back to masking, to neuronormative behavior and communication is not the solution of course, we have to gain emotional maturity in an authentic neurodivergent way.

Understanding ourselves and our needs and communicating them openly is a key factor in my experience.

Respecting other people’s boundaries and not trying to push them is another. And we have to be honest to ourselves, when it comes to that. Taking things literally, needing rules does not mean that we are incapable of nuance and that everything has to be explained in detail. Especially as an AuDHD person that can be a tricky thing, when the need for dopamine, for intensity is pushing us forward, when we are in a hyperfocus on another person.

In my experience letting relationships develop slowly, giving each other space is important, while at the same time accommodating the rejection sensitivity and need for clarity by communicating openly helps not to become dysregulated in the process. Just not responding anymore, ghosting an AuDHD person is cruel.

Our neurodivergence gives us so many skills we can use in the process of getting to know each other, connecting with each other. Pattern recognition, high empathy, honesty, analytical skills, curiosity, critical thinking skills, building routines, being structured and detail focused and so many other AuDHD strengths can help us with being our authentic, unmasked autistic selves while building healthy relationships with other neurodivergent people.

#ActuallyAutistic #AuDHD #neurodivergent @autistics

I'd like to do a round table about being neurodivergent and having food intolerance/allergies and grief.

I'd love to chat with 2-3 people on a Zoom call.

If you would be interested, please reach out through my contact form.

https://feathermanesoul.com/contact/

@autistics #ActuallyAutistic #AuDHD #AlphaGal #FoodAllergies #Neurodivergent #NeurodivergentLife

This morning there was a situation, that showed me once more how differently people experience sensory input, especially autistic and allistic people.

My personal assistant accidentally arrived one hour too early and because I had to finish some routines, I asked her if she wants to wait on the balcony. She agreed and then we had the following conversation:

Me: "It's already very hot in the sun."
She: "I can endure the sun."
Me: "Ok, do you have sunglasses?"
She: "I don't need sunglasses."
Me [big autistic eyes]: There's such a loud noise from the construction work nearby. Do you have headphones?"
She: "That's not a problem. I don't need headphones."
Me: 😯

When I opened the balcony door 20 minutes later, it felt like opening the gate to hell. These 20 minutes would have probably caused a meltdown for me. For her it was just a relaxed start into the working day.

#ActuallyAutistic #AuDHD #neurodivergent
@autistics

I think I figured out my marketing problem. I lose my words. When I go to do marketing stuff I lose my words/my mind goes blank/its like static on the fritz. (yay AuDHD!), and I'm sure it's probably driven by trauma/basically being told that my own stuff is probably wrong and not good, but am wondering if any other #ActuallyAutistic folks run into this when promoting their work.

@autistics

#AuDHD #Neurodivergent @neurodivergent

This Playlist is the outcome of an intense hyperfocus on music during the latest full moon summer nights. My feet still hurt from all the dancing.

The title Look Inside does not only refer to one of my favorite tracks on it, but also to the intense experiences I have as an AuDHD person when I am listening and dancing to electronic music, to drum and bass. It’s not only my special interest and brings me joy, it also helps me structuring my thoughts, process emotions and regulate my nervous system.

Especially the combination of the warmer, more playful and organic sounds of Jungle D&D and the darker, precisely structured Neurofunk/Techstep tracks suits the complex needs of my neurodivergence.

https://bandcamp.com/kacihue/playlist/look-inside

#ActuallyAutistic #neurodivergent #dnb
@autistics @actuallyadhd

Seriously in need of #MutualAid to keep myself and @magicalgrrrl sheltered!! Please Boost!
Everything counts!

Currently, our ongoing goal of meds is followed by our goals for food and shelter. If we can get $100 anytime soon we can get meds for the first time in a week 🥹 we are genuinely desperate for some relief. Please help if you can.

Community is literally lifesaving!!!

Paypal Donate: https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=CDA6RS8DE67RC
Venmo: (@)Lucas-Jelinek
Betty's Cashapp: $magicalgrrrl

#mutualaid #poverty #lgbtqia #queercrowdfund #mutualaidrequest #urgent #disabilitycrowdfund #disabilitymutualaid #queermutualaid #neurodivergent #trans #transcrowdfund #pleaseboost

ALT

#AuDHD projects are always like that: yes, I have a system, but I don’t have enough patience to follow it meticulously enough for it to end up as ordered and perfect as I imagined it in my head - so the result is always disappointing me or leaving me irritated with myself for not being able to follow my own instructions
@autistics
#adhd
#neurodivergent

ALT

Maybe it is actually #alexithymia speaking, but I am pretty sure I can’t feel hate.
Like, I can feel despise, disgust, loathe, horror, fear etc - but hate? Hate assumes certain amount of passion, strength - it’s something too big to bother to maintain for someone you don’t like.

Maybe it’s just my #autistic negation to use definitive labels - like the hesitancy to consider what I can feel ‘love’ or to call someone a friend.

@autistics
#neurodivergent
#autism
#AuDHD

In continuation of this post:

https://mementomori.social/@olena/116724537492462579

Playing a single-player game, I feel an urge to make a certain move. I take a look, and I clearly see it’s a wrong move, I see the rule it breaks, and I know if I do it, it will be considered a wrong move and I will be punished - lose a heart or something. There are no possible hidden positive effects to it. I make the move anyway.
Why? What happens in the brain in this moment that I still do the move fully understanding that it is wrong?
@autistics
#AuDHD
#neurodivergent

As someone with #Autism, I find the term #NeuroDivergent to be simplistically judgemental.

What is being deviated from? A trait or whole nature of autistic and non-autistic people?

And what of divergence along other dimensions? How about extroverts as divergent as they cannot tolerate time alone very well.

RE: https://mastodon.social/@DS90210/117230489226525025

Any other ND folk vibing this? 😆

#ActuallyAutistic #ADHD #Neurodivergent @autistics

I know people postet about that before, but it should be pointed out more often until it hopefully changes. Please don't integrate unnecessary background music into your videos, especially if you want neurodivergent people to watch them. It's so annoying and it prevented me from watching YouTube videos several times. Stop it.

#ActuallyAutistic #neurodivergent @autistics

I generally am quite a clumsy person, but I just realized my clumsiness gets way worse when I am overwhelmed. Got to spend four days on the Easter holidays with my nephew - and till the end of the week it’s like clumsiness x10. Everything falls from my hands, I almost drowned my phone two times, accidentally broke several plates, a glass and a ceramic pot lid, flipped several dishes and bumped many things. I’m like a walking disaster by now, so I just am sitting on my sofa trying to not touch anything fragile or expensive till I get enough of my alone time.
Did you also noticed being much more clumsy when you are overwhelmed and not having enough alone time?
@autistics
#autistic
#AuDHD
#neurodivergent

It seems to be quite a common thing among #neurodivergent people - to not want to be perceived.
I just realized that for me that is not about the perception per se.
It’s about being (possibly) judged. Not even necessarily aloud, not even necessarily by glance.
Just knowing they may judge me deep in their head/heart/soul if I am less than perfect(or even if I am too perfect, doesn’t matter). Not a fear of fail even - fear of judgement.
I don’t have problems with very small kids or animals observing me while I am doing something. But anybody I see as capable of judging makes me feel uncomfortable perceived.

Is it similar for others or is it specifically #RSD talking?
#AuDHD
@autistics

📋 SURVEY FOR PEOPLE ON THE AUTISM SPECTRUM

Do you feel that, because you’re on the autism spectrum, you often find yourself in conflict with others?

Personally, I hate conflict, but it seems to me that, because of my autism, it tends to come up quite often in my life.

Feel free to share your experiences in the comments.

I’d also appreciate a boost to get a larger sample size. Thank you! 🙏

#ActuallyAutistic #Neurodivergent #NeuroDiversity @autistics