#actuallyautistic Timeline

39d

I was reflecting on my current job situation lately, and I have to say I'm not making tons of money... actually, I currently have to pull money out of savings to keep myself afloat... but man...

I've never felt happier with my job than I do now. I get to tutor. I get to write. I get to be there for those I care about. I do all of this from the comfort of my apartment.

I don't care for offices, at all. For one thing, I don't have to deal with bullshit commutes, but it is more than not having to deal with the commute.

"But don't you need socialization???"

NO! I don't need it. The kind of socialization that happens in an office stinks!!!! Offices offer the type of socialization that requires high conformance.

It's not all flowers and bunny rabbits. I have to deal with the odd dissatisfied student or the overbearing parent.

But I'll take this over going back to the office any time of the day. I wish I had realized this earlier rather than try to make myself conform to the "social ideal."

#ActuallyAutistic

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39d

New video: How binaural beats work, and why I use 11Hz Alpha waves in my music.

AarDHD is a project creating functional music for focus and calm. The tracks use binaural beats for brainwave entrainment. The first release, "Flow State" is designed for people with ADHD and autism, or who needs help concentrating or calming down.

https://youtube.com/shorts/4Xq63W-GPiQ

#BinauralBeats #ADHD #Autism #FocusMusic #Neurodivergent #MusicProduction #ActuallyAutistic
@autistics

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39d

Diary of an AuDHD Squirrel. Day 812 , Saturday 17/01/2026

Ah Saturday!

I’ve felt a lot better today, i’m definitely on the road to recovery!

Climbing the stairs is still more exhausting that I would normally like but the other symptoms are slowly receding!

We watched a couple of episodes of ‘The Night Manager’ season 1 then decided to have a movie - ‘Dead of Winter’ (The 2025 version) with our tea, a Chinese takeaway. The move was really good - Emma Thompson providing an unusual heroine.
There is a dedication at the end ‘For Daniel’ which I cannot seem to find a reason for. I wonder if I’m being especially dense.

Final Thoughts.

I feel better able to cope with the complete chaos that is the world today!

Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖

@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves

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38d

@autistics #ActuallyAutistic

https://mas.to/@skeletor/115917416836825361

A stylized, painterly illustration of Skeletor of the Masters of the Universe, a menacing but oddly reassuring skeletal figure fills the frame.

The figure has a bright green skull-like face with deep black eye sockets glowing red, giving an intense, supernatural expression. It wears a dark hood and layered armor with angular shoulder pieces and a chest emblem featuring sharp, zigzag shapes in neon green, pink, and purple.

The background is a swirling, abstract wash of deep reds and dark shadows, creating a dramatic, almost fiery atmosphere that contrasts with the cool greens and blues of the figure's armor.

Bold white, all-caps meme text appears at the top and bottom of the image.

The top text reads, "SO, BAD NEWS. WE HAVE TO KEEP GOING TOMORROW."

The bottom text reads, "GOOD NEWS IS THAT I'LL KEEP GOING WITH YOU."

ALT

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38d

Just realized: Whenever I read outrageous news about politics, my outrage comes second. First, my brain makes an attempt to find a perspective in which it might make sense to act like these morons do.

That‘s not healthy for my brain. But I‘ve trained myself so well that I can’t seem to unlearn the reflex.

And this is the main reason why I have to avoid news these days. Of course it’s also because of the helplessness and all the bad emotions. But mainly because „understanding“ causes damage to my brain and soul.

#actuallyAutistic
@autistics

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38d

Diary of an AuDHD Squirrel. Day 813 , Sunday 18/01/2026

Sunday started around 8am after a reasonable nights sleep!

Its been a foggy & wet winters day & in classic English winter style it’s basically gonna rain for the rest of the week!

We went foraging to Costco™, it was stupidly busy but we made it thru!

A nice relaxing rest of the day, catching up on Mrs S’s shows.

Final Thoughts.

Aside from fighting off the screaming hordes in Costco™ its not been a bad day all told.

Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖

@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves

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37d

A thousand words on two and a half years of knowing I was autistic. I'd love you to read it.

https://matricardo.substack.com/p/i-didnt-always-know

#autism #autistic #neurodiversity #neurodivergent #actuallyautistic #disabled

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37d

@autistics #ActuallyAutistic

https://mas.to/@skeletor/115922785607303158

A stylized digital illustration of Skeletor from
the Masters of the Universe, a muscular, hooded skeletal character resembling a fantasy villain.

The figure faces forward with a grinning skull for a face, deep eye sockets glowing faintly, and no visible eyes. He wears a deep purple hood and cape draped over broad shoulders, along with blue-purple chest armor that exposes a defined, muscular torso.

A pale, bat-shaped emblem spans across his chest, fastened at the center with a circular clasp. The background is dark and atmospheric, tinted green and brown, with two soft, glowing orange torch flames on either side behind him, suggesting a dim castle or dungeon interior.

Across the lower half of the image, bold white capital letters with a thick black outline display an inspirational quote: "WE CAN'T BE MOUNTAINS ALL THE TIME. SOMETIMES WE NEED TO BE SMALL ENOUGH TO BE HELD IN TWO HANDS."

ALT

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37d

Prior to understanding I'm autistic, my life was a strange combination of not fitting in yet trying to fit in, and not bothering to fit in. After my self-realization, I've slowly worked on getting rid of the trying part. I never really fitted in and the more I've just been myself, the better I've felt. I'm unique and now I'm more comfortable than ever letting it show. It's also tied to being non-binary and understanding what types of clothes and accessories I want to wear. Now the main thing is that it makes me feel good. I know my style makes me stand out from the crowd. It's not that I'm done thinking what others think about me but it plays a substantially smaller role than before.

#ActuallyAutistic #NonBinary @autistics

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37d

Diary of an AuDHD Squirrel. Day 814 , Monday 19/01/2026

Woke around 8am after a rough night due to a dicky digestive system!

Really wasn’t feeling the full monty today & spent most of it searching for a suit of armour in KCD2.

Was back on semi normal food by teatime which was a relief!

Final Thoughts.

An exceptional ’hide from the world’ day today.

Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖

@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves

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36d

Diary of an AuDHD Squirrel. Day 815 , Tuesday 20/01/2026

Tuesday started around 07:30, it would have been later but I forgot to put y earplugs in so the pre-dawn chorus of next door kids woke me up.

A quiet day of chores & KCD2 - Mrs S was out in the office so I had the house mostly to myself.

Final Thoughts.

I need to go get a blood test on Thursday - I’ll have to see if I can persuade Mrs S to drop me off at the hospital because the GPs are claiming that they are snowed under. I have no doubt that I will wait several hours for the dubious benefit of some one taking 5 minutes to stab me in the arm!

Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖

@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves

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34d

Diary of an AuDHD Squirrel. Day 817 , Thursday 22/01/2026

So going forward I am just going to write this diary when something has actually happened in my day, there seems little point in writing about days when it just the usual humdrum of existence.

08:11 Oh Nuggan’s holey nuts! I just rang our GP surgery & was first in the queue!!!
This never happens! One has to ring on the dot of 8am to book an appointment & even ringing to the second I have never been first in 10 years since they 1st brought this system in!
Admittedly the appointment isn’t until Monday but still!
Also proud that I fought the phone demons & made the call - hate instigating none written comms!

So after this morning’s excitement I spent the rest of the day in medieval Bohemia painting a bull & sorting out a land rights issue!

Final Thoughts.

Just another day in Paradise, to quote Phil Collins.

Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖

@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves

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35d

RE: https://mastodon.social/@BowieSpace/115934582365987145

i really read this as in relation to autism initially.

#actuallyautistic @autistics

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35d

I am so dissociated that I'm amazed I can even engage in brief conversations.
#Autism #autistic #neurodiverse @autistics #AutisticBurnout #ActuallyAutistic

Edited 35d ago

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35d

Today I (in order):
- Slept well (above average)
- Had therapy
- Took a shortish walk (3km)
- Did shopping (not at a busy time)
- Biked to pick up kid-the-younger
- Made dinner

Before I got to making dinner I was tired, and after I was exhausted.

Granted, I did work Monday and Tuesday, but for most people that should not have significant effect later (it was normal to good days with minimal work crap.)

I’m supposedly “high functioning” autistic… *

* I only use that phrasing here “for effect”. I would not in normal cases use functioning labels.

#spoonie #ActuallyAutistic @autistics

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35d

Autism and ADHD are just words. Words that give me the possibility to talk about myself, about my experiences and to understand myself.

They stand for something that is so much more complex, something that defines my identity. Yes, it defines my identity. If it defines a part of the identity of a person, if they prefer to wear sneakers or high heels, the fact that I struggle with wearing almost any kind of clothes, especially shoes, it’s very much part of mine. It has a strong influence on how I can express myself and my personality, how I experience the world around me and my ability to interact with it. And that is just one example of many aspects that are part of my neurodivergence, of me being AuDHD, being shaped by CPTSD.

We need simplifications to communicate, to talk about our neurodivergence, to share experiences, even if these words can’t describe this experience as a whole. They are just placeholders for something so much more complex than a diagnosis, a set of traits, a label other people put on us, but they give us a voice. They are a tool that enables us to connect with each other and getting to know each other as neurodivergent people. And we need that so much.

#ActuallyAutistic #AuDHD #neurodivergent #neurodiversity

Edited 35d ago

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33d

Diary of an AuDHD Squirrel. Day 818 , Friday 23/01/2026

Friday has been another quiet day, the weather has continued to be absolutely ‘orrible. Wet, dark n cold!

The high point of the day was pizza for tea - specifically a meat feats pizza, which was as naughty as it was nice!

Final Thoughts.

I still have the remnants of that flu bug from the other week lurking, I wish I could shake it!
Hey ho, weekend tomorrow - where the hell did this week go!

Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖

@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves

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34d

@autistics #ActuallyAutistic my therapist would call this my commitment to social justice...

…employers consider this me being insubordinate

https://mas.to/@skeletor/115940125728018238

A dramatic, digitally painted illustration Skeletor form the Masters of the Universe franchise, a muscular, skeletal villain with a bright yellow skull face and hollow black eye sockets, resembling a fantasy sorcerer-warrior.

He wears a deep purple hood and matching armor straps across his bare, blue-gray chest, secured at the center by a glowing red gem.

His left arm is extended toward the viewer, with a large, clenched hand pointing directly outward in an accusatory or commanding gesture. In his right hand, he grips a tall purple staff topped with a small horned skull.

The background is dark and shadowy, with hints of stone or brick textures fading into black and violet tones, creating a foreboding atmosphere.

Bold white, all-caps text frames the image at the top and bottom, reading: "THE WAY TO RIGHT WRONGS" at the top and "IS TO TURN THE LIGHT OF TRUTH UPON THEM." at the bottom.

ALT

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33d

Living alone, I'd just have spent this weekend doing nothing, with no sensory input that I can't control. I wouldn't even have noticed there was a problem.

The way it is, overstimulated as I am from a full-day workshop and long car commute on Thursday and with no way to calm my senses through Friday, I'm sitting at the breakfast table, crying from overwhelm. My husband was making bread (loud machine!) and de-cluttering the kitchen (loud visuals) when I came downstairs to eat, and it pushed me over the edge. Even the birdsong outside the window is too much right now.

At times like these, I feel genuinely disabled by being autistic.

#actuallyAutistic #sensoryOverload @autistics

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34d

Apologies in advance for the lack of alt text, but here's my most recent GoFundMe post. Since none of the groups are boosting my posts due to a previous ban, it's better this can't be indexed. #aspie #aspielife #actuallyautistic

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33d

@autistics #ActuallyAutistic two odd experiences to share:

(1) last night, well meaning friend said to me “Ever since your diagnosis, autism [in movies and tv] seems to be everywhere.”

(2) earlier today, colleague asked me for advice on how to respond to an inquiry from an autistic person who was growing increasingly frustrated with the email exchange

i've only been diagnoses for 2 years and somehow i have become Autism Yoda for people in my sphere

not sure if i should be offended or not

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31d

the autistic urge to eat the same thing until you never ever want to see that meal again. just hit it today. ohhhh i have no idea what to do for food now

#actuallyautistic @autistics

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32d

@autistics #ActuallyAutistic my self preservation instinct has been on the fritz for some time now

https://mas.to/@skeletor/115951317928911290

A dramatic fantasy illustration featuring elements from the Masters of the Universe franchise, shows a massive, stone fortress carved into the shape of a skull, looming out of a frozen, fog-filled landscape.

The skull's eye sockets glow an eerie green, and its open mouth forms a towering entrance flanked by two tall, cylindrical towers and faint torchlight. Snow blankets the ground and whips through the air, creating a harsh, blizzard-like atmosphere.

In the lower right foreground, a lone traveler rides a large, horned, reptilian mount across the icy terrain toward the skull fortress, emphasizing the scale of the structure and the danger of the journey.

Dark rocks and drifting snow frame the scene, while the sky is overcast and gray, reinforcing the sense of cold and isolation.

At the top of the image, bold white text reads "PERSEVERANCE," and at the bottom, matching text reads, "THE COURAGE TO IGNORE THE OBVIOUS WISDOM OF TURNING BACK."

ALT

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32d

Having poor interception and alexithymia (not being aware of my body /emotions) means it's difficult for me to know that I'm getting overwhelmed and close to a meltdown until it's nearly inevitable.

I've only recently figured out some of the signs:

- Intrusive thoughts increase in intensity and violence

- More angry rumination

- Misophonia gets worse

- My shoulders are up, my fingers tapping

- I get really sleepy

@autistics #ActuallyAutistic

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32d

Good evening Squirrel Fans.

Alex Pretti, a 37-year-old ICU nurse was beaten up & then shot by ICE in Minneapolis.
I can only express my deepest condolences to his family & friends.

We had a dream :-

“Sometimes I dream that we could deal with the big crimes, that we could make a law for countries and not just for people,”
― Terry Pratchett, Jingo

If you are reading this & in the USA I hope you are safe, I hope that your voice is not silenced either electronically or otherwise. I hope you get your country back somehow.

Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖

@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves

No meme tonight, it simply feels … wrong.

Wherever you are, whatever you are doing, I hope you’re well & safe! 😊🫶🖖

#WeirdFolks #SquirrelsOfMastodon #TheMammutMoves

For today’s diary update please follow #TimsASDjourney

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