A young man buys two horses at an Arizona race track but fails to get a receipt. Later, when riding across the land of a rancher named Robeson, he's accused of stealing the two horses. Unable to prove ownership, the young man is then sentenced to prison where he's forced to do chain-gang type work. He escapes, is recaptured, and escapes again as he tries to locate the man who sold him the horses.

The "Bulldozer", a former football star, is now working as a fisherman. As a group of street-people arranges a football match against the local Armybase, he is asked to be their trainer. His boat was damaged by a submarine and he currently has no work, so he agrees.

Expert conman Joe Thanks teams up with half-breed Bill and naive Lucy to steal $300,000 from the Indian-hating Major Cabot. Their elaborate plan is full of disguises, double-crosses, and chases, but Joe always seems to know what he's doing.

The town of Newnan are seeing little green men everywhere. The military have arrived and are on the lookout for UFOs. Everyone's high strung and Sheriff Hall (Bud Spencer) is left to deal with the aftermaths of the hysteria. On his way home from patrol he happens upon a little boy claiming to be an alien by the name of H7-25. At first the sheriff doesn't believe the boy, but with the mounting evidence, even he must eventually concede. Soon the military is after Sheriff Hall and H7-25, and it is up to the sheriff to keep the boy safe and beat up large swaths of soldiers so H7-25 can go home.

Set in Europe during WWII, a group of American soldiers on their way to military prison are beset upon by a German artillery attack, escaping with Switzerland in their sights. Before making it any farther, they volunteer to steal a V2 warhead for the French Underground - taking them deep into the heart of German territory.