Realising that you are #Asexual or #Aromantic can be quite difficult because, like autism, it is a spectrum. As much as the various aspects, like being full ace, or demi, or anything else are often described as fixed points on a scale. The reality is actually a lot more fluid and even changeable over time. Especially around sex and sexual attraction and how they work, or don't work. So it's difficult sometimes to identify with it, with any real confidence.
Add in being Audhd and it becomes even more difficult and perhaps even more fluid. Because, in my case, being more Demi-sexual, than anything. It is all about getting to really know and respect the person and without being able to do that, there is no real possibility of sexual, or romantic connection. And of course, the one thing we find difficult, is getting to know people. Or, perhaps, the right people. Because for the level of connection required, compatibility really is the key. And often, for us, feeling safe enough to be able to make that connection, isn't always the easiest thing to do and neither is finding the people who we even are compatible with.
This is but one of the many reasons why I think places like this are so important. We are a community within which it's possible to find and establish this. And I have been incredibly lucky enough to have been able to do so, where, I know, I never would have anywhere else.
I am in an open relationship with @KaCi a beautiful, incredible, polyamorous, woman who I love beyond measure and who loves me. And without this place, that would never have happened. It reminds me, that despite everything going on in the world, joy and beauty and wondrous intensity are still possible and in its own way, often made so by places like this. And I will always be grateful for it and for all of you who make it this way and of course, most especially for KaCi, for making this wonder possible.
