When I was young, I used to think I'm shy. When I learned the concept of introversion, I thought it fitted me well. Lately I've become more and more sure that neither are true. Now I'm leaning towards the view that what I thought was being shy and introverted is actually a trinity of masking, trauma response, and not knowing how to act around other people. Being autistic.
actuallyautistic
Diary of an AuDHD Squirrel. Day 1061 , Wednesday 23/09/2026
Wednesday started with the usual groan at the thought of going to the gym but I got up & went anyway.
Not a bad session all told, I got a couple of tips from one of the other members which I will have to try & remember.
Breakfast & chores were followed by an hour of No Mans Sky on the PS5.
I decided to get the MacBook Pro back up & working this afternoon & spent a merry hour discovering that nearly all my usb-c cables are charging only! 🙄🤦♂️
Long story short Kubuntu is now back on the MacBook so tomorrow will see me vanish down the linux rabbit hole as I get all the basic software installed & the system tweaked to my liking.
Final Thoughts.
Not a bad day at all, I’m glad that I have a functioning Linux box again.
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves
Diary of an AuDHD Squirrel. Day 1082 , Wednesday 14/10/2026
Wednesday started a little earlier than usual for a gym day at around 06:15 as I remembered about the internet problems we were having.
Sure enuf the fault was still there - a problem to solve after my gym session.
The gym session itself was possibly the best part of the day & it half killed me!
Got home to find that I still had all my chores to do - Mrs S never one to lend an unnecessary hand.
After breakfast I started to diagnose the internet problem, long story short it looks like the input port on the Asus router that uses the virgin router in ‘modem’ mode - essentially the virgin router is normally just the access to the fibre network while the Asus router does all the heavy lifting.
Anyway, the Asus router was giving conflicting reports on the input port, on the one hand claiming black was blue that it wasn’t connected & on the other that it was fine.
Next stop - try the virgin router in normal mode - which worked fine … therefore Asus router was looking guilty as charged!
So new router (to be fair the busted one is 6 years old, almost to the day!), the grandson of the old one, as I liked the old one & never really had any major problems with it - also with a following wind I can use the old one as an extender … time will tell if that comes to pass, is on order, due Friday.
In the meant time I have cobbled together a temp solution with a netgear switch linking the various cabled devices to the virgin router - it is creaking at the seams as we speak, the linux MBP refusing point blank to connect via a cable but that’s ok as it is quite happy with the somewhat slower wifi link. (the virgin router will never win any prizes for wifi speed / strength.)
Mrs S did get us a takeaway for tea so there was a little light shining on the day.
Then the cat threw up in fornt of my chair while I was in the garage sorting out the laundry, I didn’t notice at first so it turned into a right mess, hover & Vax both got to come out & play this evening! What a great way to end the day!!
Final Thoughts.
Well that was a mostly utterly frustrating day!
The silver lining is that there is no VPN facility on the Virgin box & even if there were I would not bother with it & then have to repeat the whole exercise on Friday, so Mrs S is in the office for the rest if the week!
Hopefully tomorrow will be a much more peaceful day!
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves
Are there any good websites, videos or other resources that could help a family understand how to support a senior (i.e. an adult, older age) with Demand Avoidance?
Frustratingly, all the websites I find are about kids or from the point of view of a parent or teacher.
This senior suddenly needs to move house and so I’m looking for simple tips for what the family can do (or not do!) to support them best. I can’t imagine what this person might be going through right now with the DA. They may also be autistic, but I’m focusing on the demand avoidance because it has been a significant issue for this person for decades.
Happy for some tips in replies as well! 💚
Diary of an AuDHD Squirrel. Day 1046 , Tuesday 08/09/2026
Tuesday has been somewhat of a wasted day.
Up at around 07:30, breakfast & chores.
I had a list of things I wanted to get done but floundered at the first hurdle.
Final Thoughts.
Hopefully tomorrow will be a more productive day.
Part of the problem is that there seems to be little point to any of it these days.
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves
@autistics #ActuallyAutistic more and more performative crap at work is sapping my will to live
Team lead was absent on daily morning call, and the designer who took over running things proceeded to call us 'champs' for keeping everything in motion.
My #auDHD ass:
- starts singing "We Are the Champions" to myself
- while worrying someone will find out what an imposter I am
- and composing a round of edits for the piece she just complimented
(And as if to drive home my very point, I just had to look up the right spelling of 'compliment' vs 'complement.' AGAIN.)
@autistics #ActuallyAutistic someone just made the mistake of asking me how i’m doing…
…so i answered honestly as our people do…
…and received the standard “Oh wow. I’ll get back to you.” response…
…when will people learn
@autistics #ActuallyAutistic example of a typical conversation with a passive aggressive allistic at work…
ME: How do we send first class and certified mail from the office?
THEM: While sending typical mail from […] is an easy task, there isn’t a standard process for certified mail at […].
…note the "easy task" never defined in the rest of their email…
…and last time said passive aggressive allistic was asked this they referred the asker to me…
@autistics #ActuallyAutistic a bonus #RandomMovieTVQuotes for the community…
…i just ran across it today and i think it’s fitting for how a lot of us are feeling lately (i suspect):
I don't want to survive, I want to live.
—Solomon Northup, 12 Years A Slave
I could really use some help buying grocery items. I have rice but I need a sauce! I need frozen veg! 🥺
etrans: tasiathereader@gmail.com
https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/ourinsatiabesouls
#BlackMutualAid #MutualAidRequest
#BlackMastodon #queermutualaid
#HelpFolksLive2026 #Queercrowdfund
#disability #disabilityaid #actuallyautistic #DisabilityCrowdFund #MutualAid
@mutual_aid @mutual_aid@starflower.space @MutualAidVisibility @anarchomutual @blackfedi
@autistics #ActuallyAutistic not sure i’ve had a single person (outside this community) come close to saying this since I disclosed…
📋 SURVEY FOR PEOPLE ON THE AUTISM SPECTRUM
Do you feel that, because you’re on the autism spectrum, you often find yourself in conflict with others?
Personally, I hate conflict, but it seems to me that, because of my autism, it tends to come up quite often in my life.
Feel free to share your experiences in the comments.
I’d also appreciate a boost to get a larger sample size. Thank you! 🙏
#ActuallyAutistic #Neurodivergent #NeuroDiversity @autistics
Options: (choose one)
Edited 191d ago
I am not sure if it’s an autistic or individual thing. It happens to me so often especially with allistic people, that I ask for clarification of a complex issue and the person explains everything I already figured out about it while adding a lot of unnecessary emotional baggage to it, then stops at the point of what my question is actually about. As a result, I don’t really gain any knowledge or clarification, but have to mask and hide my frustration and have to show gratitude while I it just feels like an energy drain with no outcome.
Diary of an AuDHD Squirrel. Day 1047 , Wednesday 09/09/2026
Wednesday started early with a decent session at the gym.
Did some work tidying up the garage this morning then went adventuring in Starfield this afternoon.
Final Thoughts.
Not a bad day a few more spoons today.
I really need to get my act into gear & chase the guy from the tool charity. Not heard back from the email I sent yet.
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves
🇨🇦RE: https://mindly.social/@hephaestus/117329326736907958
And here is your surprise, fellow ND people!
#ActuallyAutistic @autistics #ActuallyADHD #ADHD #neurodivergent
Since I have been diagnosed I find showering much more difficult. I used to wash virtually every day, now I basically do it twice a week, or maybe every 4 days,and only then from a sense of shame.
#Autism #autistic #neurodiverse @autistics #AutisticBurnout #ActuallyAutistic
An autistic meltdown isn't "bad" per se.
It's also not good, at all.
Let's not moralise them.
It's a reaction - like a sneeze.
They can be traumatic and violent.
They can put us in danger.
They're scary.
But they aren't a BEHAVIOUR.
"Behaviour" implies choice.
It implies something to be managed and corrected.
A meltdown is an alarm.
It means needs went unmet for long enough that your system ran out of quieter ways to say so.
The world spends its energy silencing our alarm instead of asking what set it off in the first place.
Diary of an AuDHD Squirrel. Day 1062 , Thursday 24/09/2026
Thursday started around 7am with next door’s kids making a racket.
We took the mogs to the V. E. T. (Hey they know!! 😆 ) this morning for their vaccinations & general checkup. All good so that’s a relief!
Did some more on NMS exp 23 - getting into it now I have my ship & multi-tool back (really find it frustrating to start from scratch with the expeditions).
Spent the afternoon and evening working on my mutant macbook, getting Kubuntu back the way I like it.
Still some work to do but it’s getting there.
Final Thoughts.
Really don’t fancy the gym tomorrow - but I should really push & go anyway. Lets see how I feel in the morning.
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves
@autistics #ActuallyAutistic riddle me this…
…if you are trying to remove someone from an on-going email string that is not relevant to them...
…how the fuck is “Moving/Adding [Fill in Name] to BCC” achieving that…
…all you are doing is including them on one more email they do not need to be on in the first place…
…it just boggles the mind what the hell is going in in some alllistics heads
Diary of an AuDHD Squirrel. Day 1056 , Friday 18/09/2026
Friday started early as Fridays do & despite really not wanting to I trundled down to the gym.
I seem to have an issue with my heart rate getting too high at the moment - I’m not sure why, normally it is around 150 when I’m exercising but it keeps topping 160 which I know to be too high given my heart condition.
Not sure what I can do about it other than keep a close eye on it & rest when it peaks so high. This does tend to make the gym sessions longer though.
I spent the morning sorting out a shelving unit in Mrs S’s study. It has not been particularly level or stable since it went in following the room being redecorated.
I would have finished sooner but I got collared by a neighbour when I was outside cutting a shelf to size & we had a good long chat.
After a light late lunch I hit the PS5 for a couple of hours.
Pizza for tea accompanying our ongoing Babylon 5 fest.
Final Thoughts.
I am not fond of woodwork, I am marginally capable at best but I’m satisfied with the work I did today & Mrs S seems pleased with it so I’ll taker the win!
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves
Diary of an AuDHD Squirrel. Day 1090 , Thursday 22/10/2026
Thursday started at around 7am.
Where the day has gone I simply don’t know! Had breakfast & did some of the chores - forgot to do the laundry so I had to do that this evening.
Final Thoughts.
Gym tomorrow but right now I really don’t have the energy, maybe some sleep will help.
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@autistics
#TimsASDjourney #ActuallyAutistic #Neurospicy #TheMammutMoves
@autistics #ActuallyAutistic as a kid did your parent ever ask you:
“if your friend did something stupid, would you do it too?”
…well at my work, the answer is of course yes
![A digital graphic featuring a 3D illustration of a baby penguin set against a muted olive-green background, topped with an Instagram header for the account _justapenguin_ (featuring audio credit to Firouz Veysanlou's "Symphony No: 40 for Guitar").
Centered in the upper half is dark serif text that reads:
I don't vibe with everyone, so if you ever catch me being talkative, laughing a little too much, or actually opening up, that's me saying you're someone I feel safe with. not everyone gets that version of me\
Below the quote stands a cheerful cartoon penguin chick with rosy cheeks, an open beak, oversized black sunglasses, a cozy olive-green ribbed scarf, and bright orange feet.
In its right flipper, it holds a takeaway coffee cup with a black lid and a brown sleeve featuring an outlined heart.
The handle @_justapenguin_ is printed in delicate white script centered along the bottom.](/proxy/post_attachment/1188845/e06fc97635.jpg "A digital graphic featuring a 3D illustration of a baby penguin set against a muted olive-green background, topped with an Instagram header for the account _justapenguin_ (featuring audio credit to Firouz Veysanlou's \"Symphony No: 40 for Guitar\").
Centered in the upper half is dark serif text that reads:
I don't vibe with everyone, so if you ever catch me being talkative, laughing a little too much, or actually opening up, that's me saying you're someone I feel safe with. not everyone gets that version of me\
Below the quote stands a cheerful cartoon penguin chick with rosy cheeks, an open beak, oversized black sunglasses, a cozy olive-green ribbed scarf, and bright orange feet.
In its right flipper, it holds a takeaway coffee cup with a black lid and a brown sleeve featuring an outlined heart.
The handle @_justapenguin_ is printed in delicate white script centered along the bottom.")