Bernice "Bernie" Rhodenbarr is a burglar by trade, and she runs a bookstore as well. Her friend Carl Hefler is a dog groomer. After a successful burglary, it's discovered that a dead body was in the house she burgled. As she's the only one who can be placed at the scene of the crime, she has to use her criminal skills to clear her name of the murder AND avoid getting charged with the burglary.

Doug is a Secret Service Agent who has just completed his stint in charge protecting Tess Carlisle—the widow of a former U.S. President, and a close personal friend of the current President. He finds that she has requested that he not be rotated but instead return to be her permanent detail. Doug is crushed, and—after returning—wants off her detail as she is very difficult to guard and makes her detail crazy with her whims and demands.