A foul-mouthed finishing school graduate mistakenly winds up on an ill-fated fishing boat, and faces the wrath of a crew that considers him bad luck.

When 9 first comes to life, he finds himself in a post-apocalyptic world. All humans are gone, and it is only by chance that he discovers a small community of others like him taking refuge from fearsome machines that roam the earth intent on their extinction. Despite being the neophyte of the group, 9 convinces the others that hiding will do them no good.

In the late 1950s and early '60s, artist Walter Keane achieves unbelievable fame and success with portraits of saucer-eyed waifs. However, no one realizes that his wife, Margaret, is the real painter behind the brush. Although Margaret is horrified to learn that Walter is passing off her work as his own, she is too meek to protest too loudly. It isn't until the Keanes' marriage comes to an end and a lawsuit follows that the truth finally comes to light.

President Lincoln's mother is killed by a supernatural creature, which fuels his passion to crush vampires and their slave-owning helpers.