At age 19, a young woman is jilted at the altar. This leads to a declaration that she will swear off men forever. Now 10 years later, she suddenly decides she would like to have a child. She advertises in the newspaper for potential mates, whether by traditional methods or by sperm donors, but gets nothing but losers. However, two neighborhood men vie for her attention - her gynecologist and a professional clown.

Two former bank employees, executive Dick Van Dyke, forced into early retirement by a computer, and guard Sid Caesar, unceremoniously dismissed before his pension comes due, concoct a computerized scheme to steal from the rich (i.e. the bank) and give to the poor with anonymous checks (money accessed from inactive accounts) to average do-gooders.

An ad-agency boss (Alan Alda) leads a white-water-rafting trip into danger.

Sportswriter Andy Farmer moves with his schoolteacher wife Elizabeth to the country in order to write a novel in relative seclusion. Of course, seclusion is the last thing the Farmers find in the small, eccentric town, where disaster awaits them at every turn.

Wealthy Sunny von Bülow lies brain-dead, husband Claus guilty of attempted murder; but he says he's innocent and hires Alan Dershowitz for his appeal.

Four mental patients on a field trip in New York City must save their caring chaperone, who ends up being taken to a hospital in a coma after accidentally witnessing a murder, before the killers can find him and finish the job.

A very successful stock broker is called to court to testify against a mob boss who was into some inside trading. Andrew Morenski must become Max Hauser and go back to high school for protection from the mob.