Dr. Archie Bollen is having a midlife crisis. He's just divorced his wife and is establishing a new life for himself. One night, he catches the eye of Petulia Danner, a charming, free-spirited young woman. Petulia's vibrant personality hides her fear of her abusive husband, David, whose father is a powerful society figure. As Petulia and Archie's feelings for each other grow, they must decide what it is they truly want.

Cowardly rogue Harry Flashman's (Malcolm McDowell) schemes to gain entry to the royal circles of 19th-century Europe go nowhere until he meets a pair of devious nobles with their own agenda. At their urging, Flashman agrees to re-create himself as a bogus Prussian nobleman to woo a beautiful duchess. But the half-baked plan quickly comes unraveled, and he's soon on the run from several new enemies who are all calling for the rapscallion's head.

On the run from the police and a female roller derby team, scam artist Michael Rangeloff steals a coffin and boards a train, pretending to be a soldier bringing home a dead war buddy. He gets more than he bargained for from the train and the coffin.

Robin Hood, aging none too gracefully, returns exhausted from the Crusades to woo and win Maid Marian one last time.

A terrorist demands a huge ransom in exchange for information on how to disarm the seven bombs he has planted aboard a trans-Atlantic cruise ship. Inspired by real events.

It's 1649: Mazarin hires the impoverished D'Artagnan to find the other musketeers: Cromwell has overthrown the English king, so Mazarin fears revolt, particularly from the popular Beaufort. Porthos, bored with riches and wanting a title, signs on, but Aramis, an abbé, and Athos, a brawler raising an intellectual son, assist Beaufort in secret. When they fail to halt Beaufort's escape from prison, the musketeers are expendable, and Mazarin sends them to London to rescue Charles I. They are also pursued by Justine, the avenging daughter of Milady de Winter, their enemy 20 years ago. They must escape England, avoid Justine, serve the Queen, and secure Beauford's political reforms.

An obscure Eastern cult that practices human sacrifice pursues Ringo after he unknowingly puts on a ceremonial ring (that, of course, won't come off). On top of that, a pair of mad scientists, members of Scotland Yard, and a beautiful but dead-eyed assassin all have their own plans for the Fab Four.