A man claiming to be Carol Brady's long-lost first husband, Roy Martin, shows up at the suburban Brady residence one evening. An impostor, the man is actually determined to steal the Bradys' familiar horse statue, a $20-million ancient Asian artifact.

Estranged from his father, college student Jake is lured home to New York for Christmas with the promise of receiving a classic Porsche as a gift. When the bullying football team dumps him in the desert in a Santa suit, Jake is left without identification or money to help him make the journey. Meanwhile, his girlfriend, Allie, does not know where he is, and accepts a cross-country ride from Jake's rival, Eddie.